I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize