We need to rekindle our bromance
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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