no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
