I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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