i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize