I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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