to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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