Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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