Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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