wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I want to be your penis for a week.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
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