that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
