he thought i was a dude.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
