Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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