So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
You need Xanax blowdarts
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
