Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
