So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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