hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
wow bdsm is so cute
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
