stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
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