I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
then he tried to convert me to islam
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
