I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I will pee on everything he values.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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