Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
So much rum. So many feels.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
