There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
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