Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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