Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
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