This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
