so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Randomize
