Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
