how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
