Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'

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(703): View more from Virginia

I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance

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(+61): View more from Australia

Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.

(1-256): View more from Alabama

Is this the acid talking?

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(704): View more from North Carolina

I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now

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(908): View more from New Jersey

She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.

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(707): View more from California

I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.

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(512): View more from Texas

I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...

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