Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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