just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize