I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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