i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
