you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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