Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
how does that bad decision feel?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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