yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
