Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize
