Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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