I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
