hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize