party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
