i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
