doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I AM VODKA MAN
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
