he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I think people are normalizing furries
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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