waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
