I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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