hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Randomize
