Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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