Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize