So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
